As predicted in my last post, the Russian Men's Hockey Team didn't win Gold. That alone doesn't put them on the list. Their real sin was losing to Finland in a haunting repeat of 1940.
They need to make travel plans now, before the Cossacks murder their women and children, and ship them to a life of forced labor in Outer Mongolia.
Their best bet is to throw themselves on the mercy of an ex-Soviet republic whose hockey team lacks the depth contend in 2018. The Czech Republic, Latvia, Slovakia, or Estonia would probably take them in. Whether that would put them beyond the reach of Czar Putin is another matter.
On a positive note for Mother Russia, she won both the overall and gold medal counts. So there aren't any other impending life sentences to write about.
Speaking of the Cossacks...
This is a video of them breaking up a video shoot for Pussy Riot's latest smash, "Putin Teaches Us to Love our Motherland." It looks like an excessive attack on a harmless protest, but think again.
This is the age of Cupcake Wars, and images of 'hand-whipping' trigger subconscious thoughts of buttercream in the American psyche. What looks like a violent overreaction is actually subliminal propaganda.
Sometimes the old ways are still best.
This Didn't Go Well For Team America
Though in fairness, this team looks better heading into 2018. This year's group featured too many over-hyped old guys, not-yet-ready teenagers, and 'Middle Name: Courage'-types.
Still, America had a number of favorites who didn't get it done.
The speed-skating team was the biggest embarrassment, not just for their weak performance (0 medals), but for letting their fancy new suits become a bigger story than the skaters. All the aerodynamic dimples and advanced zipper placements mean nothing if the athletes wearing them move like curling stones.
Which brings us to...
CURLING! CURLING! CURLING!
At the outset of the Olympics, I wrote that I would not make fun of curling, but I didn't expect to get into it.
As I learned, curling is a great game of strategy and precision. Furthermore, I enjoyed the intimacy of the broadcasts. Almost every line of dialogue between players is captured, which lets us get to know the teams.
Better still, it's one of the few sports where there is no gender-based difference in level of play. As a result, it features two equally high-level tournaments.
Canada won both gold medals, with the women's team dominating its way to the first undefeated record in an Olympic tournament. They can't rest on their laurels though. By 2018, Kaitlyn Lawes will be the only curler from this rink under 38. Canada will need an injection of youth stay competitive.
Even with four years to go, the Canadian men look like strong bets to repeat in South Korea. On the women's side, watch out for the up-and-coming British rink, skipped by Eve Muirhead. They are the defending World Champions and won Bronze in Sochi. The oldest player on that rink is 25, and Muirhead herself is 23. The talent on this team is obvious, and with experience and better consistency, they should have their eyes on gold in 2018.
These Were the Most Politically Charged Games in a Long Time.
Everyone knows the Putin regime doesn't care about democracy or human rights. Just check out the Cossacks/Pussy Riot video again.
Everyone knows that the IOC makes the NCAA look transparent, fair, and honest. Four years ago, this organization decided that Chicago had safety and infrastructure problems, but Rio de Janerio was alright.
The Games are about the games. As long as that's true, the Olympics will survive the nonsense of world affairs.
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