Showing posts with label rock and roll. Show all posts
Showing posts with label rock and roll. Show all posts

Saturday, August 9, 2014

A Tidy Photo-Scrapbook From the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame

I recently completed my relocation from the great state of Connecticut to the kind of lame but economically viable state of North Dakota. It was a two day road trip that rates as one of the most unpleasant experiences of my life. Having already completed this trip (and its constituent legs) before, there was nothing novel or interesting about 48 hours of driving through boring places, sleeping at rest stops, living on fast food and granola bars, and crackly FM radio.

Anticipating this, I scheduled a detour to Cleveland to visit the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. I had never been to Cleveland, but Lebron James thought it was worth a second chance. I decided to give it a first.

To better learn the city in limited time, I took the side streets from the highway (i.e. I got lost a lot). In this way I learned that Cleveland does not rock. Lebron went back because he is the Coolest of Kids, and wherever he sits is the Cool Kid's Table. Northeast Ohio may be his home, but now it is his personal fiefdom as well. I enjoyed the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, but only go if you have some other reason to be in Cleveland.

With that in mind here my some of my favorite moments from the Hall of Fame:

My trip really began with a stop in Youngstown, Ohio for ice cream at Handel's. It's a mini-chain scattered from Illinois to Pennsylvania. Whenever I pass through, I stop at the original store just off Exit 229 on I-80. The ice cream is fresh and flavorful, with a custard-like texture. The caramel chocolate malt is the best ice cream I have ever had. This time I also tried strawberry, which was tremendous. Here it is being modeled by Michelle. She's the real rock star of this piece.


Here is the Handel's storefront. It hasn't changed since the first time I visited 12 years ago. What has changed is the neighborhood. When I first visited in 2002, Handel's was an oasis on a shuttered and crumbling road. Today it looks like an unremarkable commercial strip. Good for Youngstown.


One of the first exhibits in the Hall of Fame commemorates the great bluesmen. On display are guitars owned by greats such as John Lee Hooker, Freddie King, Robert Lockwood, Jr., and Elmore James. My personal favorite is Muddy Water's '58 Telecaster pictured here. Like other vintage Tele's this one has taken a pounding, yet looks good for many more.


The Hall of Fame also has extensive displays of performance apparel. This includes suits worn in performance by Hank Williams, and Bill Monroe, numerous James Brown jumpsuits, elaborate dresses worn by singers from Etta James to Beyonce, and even John Lennon's Sgt. Pepper's uniform.

This is a hand-tooled leather belt owned by Buddy Holly. It looks awesome yet it wasn't meant to be seen under his jacket. In keeping with his muted, nerdy look, Buddy wore his coolest accessory discreetly.


Though critical in the history of rock, Jimi Hendrix doesn't make for the best museum exhibit. His portion of the Hall is mostly occupied by stage outfits he wore. They are interesting as a whole, but there is no one piece of special importance.

Similarly, his guitars are not of great interest. Though a tremendous player, he plowed through dozens of Stratocasters and other guitars throughout his career. Thus, no one instrument takes on critical importance. This custom painted '67 Gibson Flying V is Jimi's most distinctive guitar, and his most copied. Though rarely played, it captures his fiery individualism better than any other tangible artifact. 
This is Duane Allman's '58 Les Paul in a faded tobacco sunburst. Nicknamed Hot 'Lanta, it was used extensively in the last several months of his life, and features on the album Eat a Peach. Duane acquired it through singer-songwriter Christopher Cross, which almost makes up for every time I've heard Sailing.

Though partial to Fender's during his session career, by the beginning of the Allman Brothers Band Duane had switched to vintage Gibson's, and put together a remarkable collection of late 50's and early 60's Les Pauls and SG's. Today they would be worth seven-figures, even if they didn't belong to the guy who did this.

On the back of the guitar, 'Duane' has been inlaid in used frets. This was done by the Allman Brother's road crew after Duane's death. 


These are Dickey Bett's hand written lyrics to the song 'Blue Sky' from the Eat a Peach album. The Allman Brothers (or their estates) have been very generous in allowing the Hall of Fame to display their historic memorabilia. I could have done a whole post on them.



This is Bootsy Collins' Fender Jazz Bass, which, after heavy modification became his famed 'Space Bass.' This is arguably the single funkiest instrument in existence. It was originally purchased for use during his time with James Brown. You can hear it on cuts such as 'Sex Machine,' 'Superbad,' and 'Talking Loud and Sayin' Nothing.'

Throughout the 70's, this bass was the driving engine behind the P-Funk Mothership, powering albums such as The Clones of Dr. Funkenstein, Mothership Connection, and Uncle Jam Wants You



This is the original control room from Sun Studios. Featured here is some of the equipment used in some of the foundational recordings of Rock and Roll. Not squeezed into the frame is the studio's piano. Although visually indistinct, it proved powerful and responsive to the touch of Jerry Lee Lewis.


This may be the most expensive two-guitar collection on the planet. Both these instruments are 1959 Les Pauls, which go for about $250,000. The one on the left belonged to Gary Rossington of Lynyrd Skynyrd, and was his primary guitar in the band's heyday (It was used for the bottleneck part on 'Freebird'). The one on the right is one of Duane Allman's. This particular one can be heard on the At Fillmore East live album.


Tuesday, July 22, 2014

We Do Live in a Golden Age (with Colorful Filling)...



Is Rock and Roll still relevant and viable?

Usually this question is only asked as a jump off to ramble on the decay of American pop culture. It's become the 'back in my day...' speech for younger Baby Boomers and older Gen X'ers.

Talking points include:

-Nostalgic references to bands that were never actually relevant or viable (e.g. The Velvet Underground. That's right Lou Reed, here's the eulogy you always wanted, you overrated poser. I know you'll rest in peace. The grave is a great place to have no real ideas).

-Insinuations that Ariana Grande is responsible for growing belligerence in the Pacific Rim. Yes, we'd all have one less problem without Kim Jong Un, but let's not connect dots that aren't there.

-Vague explanations as to how The Twitter has undermined the character of American youth, aka 'the kids today...' sub-speech.

But getting back to the original question, is Rock and Roll a 21st Century music form?

Yes! The problem is not the music, but the musicians. Since the early 2000's rock has been in a talent drought.

Don't worry, these things happen. Rock and Roll itself emerged partly due to stagnation. By the mid-1950's, two major wars had either killed or derailed the young talent which fed traditional pop. Rather than developing fresh new acts, the music establishment was running on the fumes of Bing Crosby, Cole Porter, and whichever big bands could still scrounge bus fare to Des Moines. The time ripe for hungry young men with a raw, homespun sound.

For whatever reason -and I still haven't heard a good one- we just don't have great rock bands right now. There are several good ones, but none that add up to more than the sum of their influences. For example, Mastodon is very good metal band, but what do they do that wasn't being done 25 years ago? Joe Bonamassa is one of the strongest guitarists of his generation, but as long as his best material is classic rock covers, he won't make the transcendent impact of players like Clapton, Hendrix, et al. Rock doesn't lack a future so much as a way forward.

This brings up the next question: If America's best creative minds aren't making good rock music, what are they up to?

That answer: They're making cookies.

Today was the first time I realized how many more types of Oreos we have today as opposed to ten or even five years ago. Once upon a time, Halloween Oreos were a big deal. Today at the grocery story, I saw seasonal Limeade Oreos.

Limeade isn't even listed on the Oreo website. But Lemon is. So is Berry, Chocolate, Chocolate with Vanilla Cookies, Peanut Butter, Marshmallow Crispy, and... COOKIE DOUGH!

At the end of the day, there's no crisis at all. Rock music lacks creative vision right now, but the difference has been made up in the Nabisco labs.        

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Become a Rock Star this Summer! No Experience Necessary!

Good day Psychoeuphorologists!

Graduation season, my birthday, and all sorts of petty obligations have taken me away from this forum for the past few weeks. Now, it's time to give back to my loyal readership.

This post will outline rock band concepts that you can implement this summer, even if you have no musical background. These ideas can be tailored for any amount of people or gear. I even hook you up with a name, song ideas, and rationalizations for why your band sucks.

Have fun and get started. The women and free booze won't wait!


Band I

Name: Dies Irae

Genre: Not Madrigal, Hard Madrigal.

Concept: Gather a few voices and get it on! Singing on pitch or in key is neither good nor desirable in the Hard Madrigal genre. You want that edgy, cacophonous sound that takes your audience to the Eighth Layer of Hell. The Gregorians can keep their toothpaste-jingle chants. You sing in the language of the Early-Modern Street.

EP Track List: 1) Non al Suo Amante (Petrarch/da Bologna) 2) The Lamentations of Jeremiah (T. Tallis) 3) Crucifixus (A. Lotti) 4) Mash-up: My Bonny Lass She Smileth/April is in my Mistress's Face (T. Morely)

Why your band never made it: Excommunicated from most venues for refusing to sing Scarborough Fair.


Band II

Name: Penis Envy

Genre: Protest rock, punk.

Concept: A Pussy Riot tribute band! In an interview, Yoko Ono was asked if she thought Pussy Riot had any musical merit beyond their politics. She dodged the question. If Yoko Ono thinks they suck, how good do you have to be to play their hits?

EP Track List: (All songs by Pussy Riot) 1) Putin Got Scared 2) Death to Prison, Freedom to Protest 3) Raze the Pavement 4) Kropotkin-Vodka 5) Punk Prayer (Virgin Mary Put Putin Away)

Why your band never made it: KGB plot.


Band III

Name: Feelings Have Feelings Too

Genre: Wuss rock

Concept: What do you call someone who plays the tambourine, the kazoo, and the bongos? If you said  'a first-grader,' you're an insensitive bastard! They prefer the term 'multi-instrumentalist.' You'll need some friends for this one. One person playing a novelty instrument badly is bad. If nine people do it together, it's complex, nuanced, and intellectual. You may want to consider stage personas as well. For example, if you're Bruce Hammersmith from Bakersfield, CA, you should probably perform as Eliot Liebenstien from San Francisco.

EP Track List: (All songs by E. Liebenstien) 1) Remember the Africa Babies 2) Love as Warm as Vinyl 3) Estrella Roja 4) Concerto for Vuvuzela and Ukelele 5) The Ballad of Margaret Sloan-Hunter

Why your band never made it: You were always bigger in Europe.


Band IV

Name: The Gathering

Genre: Unknown

Concept: The band never actually existed. For the purpose of impressing chicks, it was a group you had with a couple friends back when you lived in another country. You had a nice little run of club gigs, and even scored a record deal. You won't find the record on this side of the Atlantic, and the label went out of business before the age of digital distribution.

EP Track List: Does it matter?

Why your band never made it: Too critically acclaimed to succeed.